I Will Never Leave Thee Nor Forsake Thee
Jana’s Note: It was only a couple months ago when I saw a small paragraph in a magazine, asking prayer for a family of 10 who had recently lost their mother. I was deeply shocked by this news, putting myself in this family’s place, and thinking what it would be like if my mother suddenly died. As the oldest girl was my age, I sent off a card expressing my sympathy. Heather wrote back a thank-you note, giving a brief update on her family. A different friendship was begun, unlike any I have ever experienced. We are not considered pen-pals formally, yet we have still exchanged letters for many months now. And Heather was gracious enough, per my request, to tell her story to you all.
Some of you may have questions, or wish Heather told more of her feelings during this time. As she wrote to me, “While our feelings may be important to some extent, they aren’t the most important. We want to give God the glory and focus on what he has said and done and how he has protected us, rather than on our feelings and what we have said or done. I want God to get the glory and not bring attention to myself.”
May you all encouraged and strengthened by her true story, as you remember God will truly never kave you nor forsakeyou.
—Jana Marie Baldridge
Hello! My name is Heather Eley and I’m 16 years old. I’d like to share how the Lord has helped our family through some trials this past year.
First, let me introduce my family: Daddy (David), myself, Elijah (14), Joshua (13), Benjamin (10), Jessica (9), Jacob (7), Samuel (5), Josiah (3), and Rebekah (2). It’s a real blessing having a big family, especially when everyone helps each other and we all work together!
Daddy used to drive a semi truck long-distant until about a year ago when our mother passed away. On April 13, 1997, Mommy died suddenly. It was a big shock to all of us because we weren’t expecting anything like it. Mommy was in good health and had been perfectly well that day. The name that the authorities used is PRESUMED CARDIAC ARRHYTHMIA SECONDARY TO CARDIAC ISCHEMIA RESULTING IN CARDIOMYOPATHY AND DIFFUSE INTERSTITIAL FIBROSIS.
It was a Sunday evening, about 8:30 p.m., and Daddy and Joshua were on a semi-truck trip in California at the time. The rest of us children were at home, upstairs, all ready for bed, except for Josiah and Rebekah.
They were still downstairs with Mommy when we suddenly heard a scream. It sounded like one of the little ones, like Josiah or Rebekah. We ran downstairs to see what had happened and there was Mommy lying on the kitchen floor. Rebekah was standing by her, whimpering slightly.
“Oh, no!” I cried, and went down on the floor beside Mommy. “Mommy! Mommy!” I cried over and over again, trying to get her attention. “Elijah, call 911,” I said. I can’t describe the feelings that went through me at that time. I was thinking, “Daddy’s not here, what are we going to do? We’re all alone!” The other children were crying and praying out loud and I tried to comfort the little ones. I was praying, “Dear God, please don’t let Mommy die, Lord, please!”
Elijah also called our Grandpa and Grandma Eley, Daddy’s parents, and soon the house was full of people. Within minutes the ambulance, Grandpa and Grandma Eley, and also Grandpa and Grandma Cox (who live about a half mile down the road) were all there. The ambulance people wanted us to stay out of their way, so we all had to go in another room.
The coroner, one of the men that came with the ambulance, came in and asked us, “We need to know the details to determine the cause of death.”
When he said that, it seemed like my heart just broke and I thought, “There’s no hope.” I turned to Grandma Eley, who was crying, and said, “Are we going to lose her?” and she just said, “Yes, Heather.”
We were all sobbing.
The coroner wanted me to tell him what had happened, like how we had been upstairs and we heard the scream and so on. I told him what I could think of.
What a hard night! I didn’t sleep at all but I did much praying. The events just kept running through my mind. It was hard for me to trust God completely, knowing that He knew what was best. I kept wondering why it had to be Mommy. People die, but why did our own mother have to?
But, because Mommy was saved, I know that she’s in Heaven today and what a blessing to know that! When we think about the joys she’s experiencing up there, we wonder why we’re crying about it. That’s not to say we don’t miss our mother because we do very much. There are times when I think, “Oh, I wish Mommy were here to see Rebekah! She’s so cute in her new dress.” (Rebekah really does get cuter every day.) But now it’s much easier for me to trust God completely and we have something to look forward to now, being reunited with Mommy in Heaven one day. Over the past year, we as a family and I, as an individual, have grown much closer to God. He is a good Lord!
The next day, Monday, Daddy called home from California. Elijah told him what had happened and it was a shock to him too. He parked his truck in Nevada and then flew home with Joshua, so they could get home quicker. There were hugs and tears. As I was talking to Daddy, he said, “I think we’re going to have to sell the semi truck and I’ll stay home with you guys.”
I said “Okay.” But I kind of liked our big, red semi truck! It meant changes for us but we also have another business, a rental business, and Daddy was driving the truck on top of that. Now Daddy runs the rental business and can stay around home. We rent apartments out to people and the older children help in the cleaning and painting when needed. That’s one thing we can be thankful for, that God blessed us with a business that allows Daddy to be home with us most of the time and at which we can all work.
We had Mommy’s funeral on Friday, April 18. It was a hard time for us. But the pastor that gave the message told about five things that happened when Mommy died. They were: (1) She found out how easy it was to die. (2) She instantly met her guardian angel. (3) She was quickly ushered into heaven. (4) Mommy met all of her saved friends and relatives who had gone on before her and were waiting to greet her. (5) She was then ushered into the presence of God.
That’s an awesome thought, to be ushered into God’s presence!
After the funeral was over, we went back to our house. Daddy was planning to take us children over to Grandpa Eley’s so he could fly back to Nevada and get the truck. We were going to leave at about 5:00 p.m. and we had a few hours then so we all took naps.
For some reason we overslept till about 5:30 p.m.—maybe God allowed it. But when we woke up and saw it was 5:30, we hurried and started packing our clothes to go to Grandpa’s house. It was then that we noticed that several police cars had pulled into our driveway. Daddy said, “I wonder what they want,” and went out to talk to them. We children didn’t know what was going on. I honestly thought the police were talking to Daddy for some business reason.
Later, I found out these people had come from the Welfare Department to take us children away and put us in foster homes. We found this out after we had been put in the homes. The Child Protective Service (CPS) is a government program that tries to “help” families by removing the children from the home if they think or have been told that the children are being mistreated, neglected, or abused. We didn’t realize right then, but the CPS was here to take us away.
Daddy and the men came back into the house. Daddy said, “These men want to take you away for a few days.”
One guy interrupted, “We want to take care of you while your dad gets his truck, okay?”
I looked at Daddy. He said, “Is everything all right, Heather?”
“Well, I don’t understand what’s going on,” I said, trying to keep from crying.
“I don’t either. But just remember, there’s power in prayer,” Daddy said.
Then we told Daddy good-bye and went outside with the policemen. They took us in their cars to the jail in Winchester and had us wait while they called foster homes. No one wanted to take all nine of us so we were separated into three groups—myself, Jessica, and Rebekah in one; Elijah, Joshua, and Benjamin in another; and Jacob, Samuel, and Josiah in another. By the time they got us off into the foster homes, it was pretty late—about 10:00 p.m. Jessica and I were upset and we stayed awake for a long time that night, crying and praying together.
My mind was full of questions—“What’s happening? Why is it happening?” I still didn’t really know all the details and was scared.
I asked some of the welfare workers if I could call Daddy, or my brothers, or even Grandpa and Grandma Eley, who did approve of our lifestyle. Their answer was no and I asked why. They said they couldn’t let us see or talk to each other because it wasn’t allowed.
Now really, I couldn’t understand that at all. Why wasn’t I allowed to talk to the boys? All I wanted to do was to find out where they were and what had happened to them. I found out they don’t allow that in the fostering system.
Most children removed from their home the way we were will never be allowed to return home or see their parents again. The CPS wants to break all family ties. This also gives them the advantage while they are interrogating us. We spent six days in our foster homes, separated like that. During that time I was questioned by the welfare workers about our home. They tried to dig and find out things about our family that they’d be able to use against us, and they tried to get me to say and confess to things that were not true. I always told them the truth, though—we weren’t being mistreated, our home was fine, we were being fed enough food to eat, and so on. They would ask me personal questions.
Once they even said, or suggested, that we children had something to do with Mommy’s death. The authorities could not determine the cause of death the evening mommy died. Rumors started flying. The people at the CPS said that maybe Elijah had gone down and strangled Mommy or that Daddy had come home and did it also.
My foster home was really dirty. There were two big dogs living in the house and dog hair was everywhere. It was filthy, like it hadn’t been cleaned for a long time. The people smoked, and there was loud rock music. I ask the foster mother if I could help clean the house. She let me do it.
I had never had to lean on Jesus so much in my life. One verse I found so encouraging was Hebrews 13:5-6 where it says, “I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee. So that we may boldly say, The Lord is my helper, and I will not fear what man shall do unto me.” What a promise! We must never fear what men can do to us, for God promises, He will never leave us!
On Thursday, April 24, we children were able to come back home. On Wednesday and Thursday there had been a court hearing to decide whether we could come home. It was a wonderful answer to prayer and it taught us a lot about trusting in God even when we don’t know what’s going on. We were so happy to be together again!
There was a hospital that did an autopsy, and after a couple of months it showed that Mommy had died a natural death with heart failure. Her heart just stopped beating. And you know, that’s probably the easiest way to die—when God says, “It’s time to come home,” and He just takes your soul.
After we came back home, the Welfare Department wanted Daddy to put us in a school. We had been home schooling for ten years and so that was a big change. We had to go to a Christian school but it was only for six weeks until school was out for the year. Our Aunt Diane, Daddy’s sister, helped out tremendously during that time. She came from Indianapolis, where she lives, every single weekend until September and helped with the housework.
There was one time in June when the Welfare Department wanted Daddy to sign an agreement with them but Daddy said it would be morally wrong and refused to do so. By signing the agreement, Daddy would be admitting guilt of the abuse and neglect that they said was taking place. He would also be agreeing to allow the government to provide all kind of services and supervision to us.
The judge threatened to put us children back into foster homes if Daddy didn’t sign the agreement by June 20. We were afraid that they would take us away again but Daddy talked to each of us and asked us if we children would have faith that God would keep us together if he didn’t sign. Again, Hebrews 13:5-6—“I will not fear what man shall do unto me.” We had faith and so Daddy didn’t sign it. On June 20, we had a prayer meeting and rally here at our home. Many people came and it lasted several hours. We were all very sober. We prayed so earnestly that God would just keep those people away from our family and He did. They never showed up! Praise God! It was only by God’s power that we stayed together.
During the summer we children were ordered by the judge to go see a counselor to get grief counseling. The counselor was not a Christian. The Scriptures says “Blessed is the man that walketh not in the counsel of the ungodly.” () So we refused to counsel with him. (Other passages concerning ungodly counsel: Numbers 31:16, 1 Kings 12:6-11,28; 2 Chronicles 10:10, 22:3, Job 2:9.) He was part of the Welfare Department and was looking for something to use against us, too. We prayed again that the Lord would protect us throughout this situation, and praise His name, He did.
In the fall, the Welfare Department wanted us children to go back to the Christian school. But Daddy said that it was his conviction that we home school. He had compromised his conviction in the spring, and put is in the Christian school hoping to pacify the Welfare Department. Daddy said that he could not continue to compromise his conviction so once again we spent much time in prayer asking for God’s protection. Once again God fulfilled His promises to us and kept His hand of protection over us as we started home schooling again.
We were under the scrutiny of the Welfare Department until finally, in November, the judge unexpectedly called for a hearing. The judge placed a gag order on the hearing; that is, we could not tell anybody about it. Daddy’s attorney said it appeared that the judge was angry, probably about us children not counseling with the counselor and that Daddy was home schooling us again. We were told that the judge may find in contempt, put him in jail and put us children back in foster care. But as you know, by now we had seen God’s hand working and protecting us time and time again and keeping us together as a family. God had brought us this far as a family, and allowed us to stay together. It was hard to think that we would be separated now.
But we were still concerned about our situation. It appeared that it had taken a turn for the worst. So again we and our friends and family prayed and once again God was with us. He protected us and kept us together as a family. The morning of the hearing, the judge canceled the hearing and rescheduled the hearing for November 21. The judge opened this hearing up to public and then dismissed our case! We feel that the turned his heart.
We had been praying for a dismissal for so long and God finally said, “Yes.” It was such a belssing to be free again and not having people tell us we have to do this and we have to do that. What a tremendous answer to our prayers.
Our Cox grandparents, and the entire Cox family—aunts, uncles, etc.—are very angry and bitter towards us. They can’t accept the fact that they lost their daughter and sister, and they’re taking their anger out on us. They are the ones who called the Welfare Department on us and told them many untrue things about us. They have never approved of our lifestyle. We live a simple and plain life, dress modestly, wear head-coverings, and home school. We have church in our home, sometimes with others, sometimes by ourselves.
The Coxes don’t like this. They are very worldly and sinful people, and have a lot of bad influences in their home. They are demanding that we be forced to go down to their house to visit them and are trying to get a judge to issue an order to that effect. We don’t feel comfortable going to their home, and really don’t want to.
Daddy has offered for them to come to our home to visit us, but to this day they have refused to do so. It is sad that there are people like this out there; but the only thing we can do is pray for them.
Daddy said that God is preparing us children for something ahead in our lives. As I think back over all that has happened in the past year, I know God had a purpose in it. And as time goes on, we as Christians may have to stand for our faith more and more. What we went through was really religious persecution, and a spiritual battle for the hearts and souls of our little children. We were told by the Welfare Department that there are other lifestyles that they wanted us to know were okay to live.
Daddy said that, as time goes on, Satan will contiune to use the government and its agencies to pesecute born-again, blood-washed saints of God, and that the time could come when we could be persecuted much like the martyrs of years gone by. We need to pray diligently for strength to endure whatever God may allow.
It takes trials and stretching to bring us closer to God and make us on fire for Him; I want to learn all the lessons He has for me to learn! May God bless each of you as you strive to serve Him!
—Heather Eley