From Letters of Love and Counsel for “Our Girls”
Conviction of Sin
Dear Girls:
Those of you who have been in the company of religious people have often heard this word used; but perhaps some have never stopped to think what it means. If a man has committed an offense against the laws of our state or country, the evidence is given against him and he is judged guilty, or convicted of a misdemeanor. When the word of God is read or preached it reveals to us what the standard or law of right is, and as we apply it to ourselves, we see that in many ways and very many times we have transgressed the law of God and stand before Him guilty—convicted of wrong-doing, or sin; for all that is wrong is sin.
If we heed this conviction, let it rest upon our hearts and minds, our wrong-doing will be a very heavy burden, and we become very anxious to have it removed. There are two ways to gain relief. One is a very unwise and wicked way, and the other is a wise and joyous way. Some grieve God by resisting and turning from this conviction to deeper earthly joys and pleasures, thus often drowning it in worldly gaiety. But it will arise again and again, and often in the height of frivolous amusement they can realize the displeasure of God—convicted of sin. The other way is to obey the scriptures, seek God for the pardon of past transgressions, sincerely repenting of and forsaking them, so they are blotted out of the book of remembrance, and through the merits of Jesus’ death, they do not longer stand against us.
It is blessed to be reconciled to God through the Son. Some have been under deep conviction at different times and have turned from it, and they feel very indifferent about their salvation. Every one who knows she ought to serve God, knows it is wisdom, should seek God for conviction of sin, by prayer and by reading His word.
A sister who was an invalid during her youth was peevish and easily teased by her fun-loving brothers, which made her very angry, and many quarrels and disagreements arose, making home very unpleasant.
Once in a mild rebuke, her mother said, “My child, will you never stop this quarreling until I am laid away in the grave?” It weighed heavily upon her, and, as she walked in the yard, a strong desire filled her heart to have salvation; because that would make her kind to her mother the rest of her days. So she knelt and asked God to show her how sinful she was; to give her a deep conviction of sin. And He answered her prayer immediately, making her to realize the exceeding sinfulness of sin. Then she felt she was the chief of sinners and it would not be strange if the earth would open and swallow her up to hide her from an offended God, against whom she had sinned times without number. She continued to pray and yield herself to God until He pardoned her transgressions for Jesus’ sake, and made her a new creature.
Some are waiting for something to happen to them to make them very anxious to get saved, but every time you read the word of God or hear it preached He is speaking to you, asking for your love and service; and you have no assurance that something wonderful will transpire to bring you to a decision to serve Him. Others want to be arrested by the Spirit and fall before the Lord, as Saul on his way to Damascus. There were numbers saved at that time, yet there is no record of any more such wonderful manifestations of the Spirit; but many inquired, “What shall we do [to be saved]?” (Acts 2:37) and they were told to repent, believe, and be baptized. While God uses very many ways to help us yield our wills to Him, it would be too bad to wait for sickness, or death of our loved ones, or for some fearful accident to make us serious or to concern us about the welfare of our precious souls. As we look back upon our lives we see many things which we believe were permitted, to bring us where we could hear the pure gospel preached and where we could yield ourselves to God. If we had not been so hard to hear, heed, and understand the things that concerned our welfare, we had not needed to pass through some of these severe trials and circumstances.
I think perhaps my own experience might help someone, so I will give it to you. About a year after I asked God to give me again a tender heart, while at school, I attended a meeting where every possible persuasion was used to induce the young to understand they ought to serve God; but this did not bring conviction of sin. I did not know how bound I was by the fetters of sin, and that of myself I could not serve God acceptably; but I obeyed the instruction given, and said I would serve Him (in my own way), and then they said that I should believe that as I came to God, He would not cast me away but would receive me.
This was done with the head, or intellectual faith, but as I was not convicted of sin, there could not be the heart faith that is necessary for the real conversion of the soul.
So I thought as God was so good I would please Him by being good. Then the real conflict began. I would see one fault in myself and give special attention to try to get the victory over it: when pretty well satisfied on that line, other faults would receive notice and I would battle a while on that line, trying to subdue my enemies; but while my attention was directed to them, behold, the first fault would arise and gain a victory.
Thus while I fought, on every side was defeat. Often discouragement would prevail, and as others seemed to take things easy, I would too, until, aroused again to think that some day I ought to get so good as never to do anything I knew to be wrong, I would begin again to battle against sin. Oh, how miserable was my life! The only joy there was in it was in thinking that some time I would gain heaven, if I “fought to win the prize.” While I read the Bible some and prayed, it was not a pleasure, but a duty.
After nine years of this life, through many changes, the opportunity came to hear the Word preached more perfectly. Consecration was more carefully taught, and that everything that the Bible condemns was to be given up, and then God would make such a change in the heart that no desire would arise to do those things. That seemed so blessed after such a weary struggle, that I was very anxious to obtain it. So one thing after another was given up until finally a sweet peace rested upon me and there was such a change in my heart, because the old sins had passed away. About a month afterward I looked back and rejoiced that my controlling sins were vanquished enemies; for I did not yield to them any more, through the change wrought by God in my heart.
Now, dear girls, you see from that nine years’ experience in conflict with sin, that I saw how awful it was and fully believed that only divine power could set me free. Do you realize that all that are not saved are thus bound by the fetters of sin, and so are servants of sin? Are you willing to have those fetters broken? Do you know that if you ask God to help you to be willing and to decide for the right, He will do so? Oh, how intense is the desire within my heart that these letters may help you to be wise in seeking first the kingdom of God and His righteousness!
Those of you who are not converted, but who think you are not doing wrong, please read what the Bible says about the works of the flesh, in Galatians 5:19-26; Ephesians 5:1-8; and Colossians 3:5-18. Now, they who do just as they please to do are walking after the flesh and are called to repentance, or they shall perish. Oh, dear girls, we cannot be righteous without the pure religion of the Bible, which is termed salvation, which means deliverance from sin.