Joe’s Awakening

As has already been stated, Joe was of an unusually quick temper, which often caused him quite a great deal of sorrow. After he had lost control of himself, he would always express himself as being weak, but perhaps there would be something in the sermon on the next Sunday morning that would be of help to him. As each Sunday came and went, however, Joe found himself not gathering strength from the messages that he so much desired. The sermons to which he listened were usually along the distinctive doctrines of that particular faith, and Joe and Susie were well schooled along the line of sobriety, baptism, honest toil, and plainness of dress. In all this Joe felt that he was truly a model to any member who might desire to look upon him as a pattern, but still his heart cried out for something that he felt he needed. So strong was the desire within his soul for something that he did not possess that he one day called upon the minister for a conversation along the line of his spiritual needs.

After listening for some time to what Joe had to say about himself as to the longing of his soul, the old minister said, “Now, Joe, I have known you for a number of years, and if you come to me telling me that you are not what you feel you should be, I will have to say I do not know where to turn to find one who is really a servant of God. Do you not know that you have lived a life here in this community that is above reproach?”

“That may all be true,” replied Joe, “and I am glad that I have lived a good, clean, moral life, but all that I have done has not brought me the relief nor peace of soul that I so much desire.” Here he paused for a few moments and then related to the minister the many times when he could not control himself and would give vent to violent outbursts of temper. “This,” said Joe, “is the thing that is troubling me. I want to get stronger along this line, for after I have those outbursts I have such a fear in my soul. I wonder if I should die then if I could hope to enter heaven.”

“Why do you let such trifling things trouble you?” inquired his pastor. “Do you think that you shall ever become a man greater than the apostle Paul?”

“No, I do not think that I shall ever become such a man as he was,” reluctantly replied Joe, “but that is not the thing I am seeking after. I do not care for greatness, but I desire to feel that I am truly a child of God and ready to meet Him at any time. You know, a few days ago my clothing got fastened in a piece of machinery, and if help had not been given me immediately I should have been ground to pieces. The first thing that came to me after the excitement had died down was, ‘If I had been ground to pieces, where would my soul have gone?’ I tell you, Brother Reinhart, this has become a serious thing with me and I want you to give me some advice as to what to do about it.”

“My dear Brother Joe,” said the preacher, Mr. Reinhart as he laid his hand upon Joe’s shoulder, “did you not know that these are problems that confront all of us? The apostle Paul was not exempt from them, for we read where he had just such trials as you are now facing. Let me read you what he had to say about it.” And opening his Bible, the pastor read Romans, the seventh chapter, beginning with the fourteenth verse. As he read the nineteenth verse he said, “Now, Brother Joe, that is your experience also. You do not want to give vent to your feelings, but you do the thing that you do not want to do. I tell you it is an up-hill business all the way through and you can’t go on your feelings. I must say that my experience is like the apostle Paul’s also, for when I would do good evil is also present, and sometimes the things that I hate are the things that I do.”

“But is there no way for us to know that we are ready to meet God at any time?” earnestly inquired Joe.

“We can know no more than the Bible tells us about such things,” replied Preacher Reinhart, “and I shall read to you what the good Book has to say about it.” So opening his Bible to Mark, the sixteenth chapter, the preacher began to read from the fifteenth verse: “ ‘And he said unto them, Go ye into all the world, and preach the gospel to every creature. He that believeth,’* (Mark 16:15-16) ” here he paused, and looking at Joe, said, “Do you believe?”

“I surely do believe,” said Joe.

The minister continued, “ ‘And is baptized,’ and have you been baptized?”

To which Joe replied, “You know that I have been baptized, for you administered that rite yourself.”

But the minister continued reading without making any reply to Joe’s statement, “ ‘Shall be saved; but he that believeth not shall be damned.’ Now, if you believe and have been baptized the Bible says you shall be saved. It does not say you are saved, but shall be. You know there is much to come up against us and something that we have to do.

“I want to read to you again from Paul’s writings to the church at Philippi. In Philippians, the second chapter and the twelfth verse, Paul says, ‘Wherefore, my beloved, as ye have always obeyed, not as in my presence only, but now much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling.’* (Philippians 2:12) You see, Brother Joe, this is a job you have to work at, and you must work it out for yourself, for it is your own salvation. I can only say to you as Paul said to the church at Philippi, as you have always obeyed and lived up to the rules and regulations of the church, just keep it up and work out your own salvation. I will have to say that I have about all that I can do to work out my own salvation, and then sometimes I think that I am not doing a very good job at it.”

“Well, if that be the case,” laughingly replied Joe, “I shall not bother you anymore, for I do not want to call you away from your job. I want you to make good.”

A few more remarks were exchanged between the two men and then Joe climbed into his wagon and started for home. Although the heaviness had not left his breast, he consoled himself with the thought that his pastor had given, that he would not be damned, for he believed and had been baptized. So he said to himself as he drove along, “I shall work out my salvation more diligently than ever.”

Upon his arrival at home Joe found his uncle awaiting him and he was very glad to see him. After supper was over and they were all gathered together in the living room, his uncle made known to them the object of his visit. He owned a large tract of land in the Wabash bottoms in Indiana, and as Joe, when he had married, had asked his uncle to rent the place to him, the uncle came to tell Joe that he might now have the place, as the tenant who was farming the land at the time of Joe’s marriage was leaving. This was very fertile land and Joe desired to farm it very much, but as it was such a large tract he did not feel that he could handle it all alone, and mentioned the fact to his uncle. The uncle then told of a man and his wife who lived near him that he thought the very people Joe needed to help manage the farm, and as there was a large two-story house upon it, it was decided that all could live together in the house while they farmed the land for the first year, and then if all were satisfied, the uncle would erect a house on the place for the hired help for the next year. This place was so desirable for farming that Joe felt he could not let the opportunity slip by again, so before the uncle left he made arrangements to move onto the place the first of the next year.

The weeks that passed between the visit of the uncle and the move the first of the year were busy ones, and the first of the year found them on their uncle’s farm. There was much to be done after the move, preparing for the spring work, and also to make preparation for the hired man whom they were expecting about the first of March.

As there was a church of their faith at Steele’s Crossing, about two miles from their place, Joe and Susie were soon settled as members of that congregation. Joe was no longer troubled about his spiritual condition, for he knew that he believed and had been baptized and was doing all that he could to work out his salvation. It was with this confidence within himself that he met Alfred and Tillie Giese, when they made their appearance the first of March to take up the position of helpers on the farm.

It was quite late in the evening when they came, and Joe and Susie extended to them hospitality in urging them to remain with them for the evening’s meal, and also to spend the night with them, as it was too late to think of arranging their own rooms in the house for the night. As they began to make preparation to retire for the night, Alfred remarked that they always had reading and prayer before they retired, and asked if there were any objections to their doing so now. To which Joe replied that he did not see how there could be any objections, as he had been a church-member almost all his life. As Alfred opened his bag to get his Bible, Susie stepped into another room from which she soon returned with a little white cap on her head, after the custom of her faith.

When all were seated Alfred read from the third chapter of First John, and Joe listened very attentively. The fourteenth verse sent a dagger into his heart, for he heard the words, “We know that we have passed from death unto life, because we love the brethren. He that loveth not his brother abideth in death.”* (1 John 3:14) How those words rang in his heart and brought again that restlessness of soul, for he did not know that he had passed from death unto life, and he did know that he did not love all the brethren, for he had remarked to Susie only a few days before that there was one man in the church whom he just hated. God’s Word pierced him like a knife. But the Word was not all that gripped his heart, for the prayers that followed gave him such a heaviness in his chest that it seemed he could scarcely breathe. Alfred and Tillie Giese prayed as only those can pray who are fully acquainted with their God. There was no pleading for mercy and forgiveness or acknowledgement of sinfulness such as Joe had been accustomed to listening to, but praise and thanksgiving for sins forgiven, and for the peace and rest which comes through the knowledge of salvation. Joe thought he had never heard such prayers before, and, when in their own room, expressed himself to Susie as never having heard such.

“I guess the prayer was all right,” she said, “but I would have enjoyed it more if she would have had her head covered.”

Joe laughed as he replied, “Her head was uncovered, but I believe she can beat you with your cap on.”