Complete in Him
Complement. The word means something that completes or makes perfect. We talk about complementary colors, how clothes, houses, or places may or may not suit us, or how someone is our “right hand.” We find satisfaction in a “perfect match,” whether in a jigsaw puzzle or how the sofa fits the living room. And there is pleasure in knowing that we have fulfilled a need or someone has filled ours.
Isn’t that how we envision marriage—finding the “right one” for me, the perfect fit, my complement? If we have been privileged to see it working in Bible order, the completeness of two parts making a whole, we desire that satisfaction. But it is not dreaming that will bring it to us. It is in accepting the proposal already given—by the only One that brings satisfaction.
There is a completeness our Lord has designed for us in Him. We may question, how can He really when I can’t touch or see Him? But this experience goes deeper, closer to our hearts than any human relationship. And yet we can relate it to our ideal of marriage in a very meaningful way. How? Let me endeavor, by God’s help, to show you.
When we really sit down and soberly consider what we’d want in a life partner, we begin to study character, and particularly, the principals, vision, personality that we can admire. We want someone that will capture our heart, but is also enduring and faithful. Someone to love us, not only on the surface, but when we show our worst side. When nobody else understands and cares, will he? The ideals rise up high enough to check off any ordinary mortal being. But don’t despair; there is yet a Prince who surpasses our wildest dreams.
“My beloved is like a roe or a young hart: behold he standeth behind our wall, he looketh forth at the windows, shewing himself through the lattice. My beloved spake, and said unto me, Rise up, my love, my fair one, and come away.” (Song 2:9-10) The endearing names charm us, the desire of belonging calls us, and the visage of strength and beauty thrills the heart. Would you not have Him call you His Delight, Treasure, and Desire? Then He must be called Best-Beloved, Lord, and Heart-Love. Marriage is a two-way relationship; it takes effort on both sides. This Prince has given us His all that we might be entirely His own. But it will only work if we make the vows and stick to them.
Let’s take this relationship step-by-step. First we hear about the man and we have our first impressions, but when we discover his intentions we must come to a decision. He’s asking for me. We first consider our interest in the matter, do we not? What does he have to offer that I want? But when we get down deeper, we make our choice on the lasting and permanent: where will this take me? So when Jesus calls for our heart, we must count the cost. Regardless of past feelings or questions, this offer calls for a serious answer. I give my all to Thee, or, I don’t.
Why would I give my all to Him? Are there any good reasons? We’ve been talking about how He’s everything a heart could wish for. We have reason to believe in His character. There is a call in our heart to belong, despite all the fight and the desire of our own way. All our reason and nature desires love, someone to adore, to serve, to be complete in.
But sometimes the damage and hurt is so great that fear and mistrust overrule all else, and then what? Then He says, “Try Me, prove My love, come to the haven of rest I’ve provided.” He has all we can desire or need. All. So why refuse? Because we want our freedom, independence, to be untouched, and protected from being hurt again. But is this reasonable or fair? As our Maker, He has first right to our life because He knows so much better how to make us truly happy. And with His own life blood He has proven His proposal of love on Calvary.
This proposal can not be received as a ticket to a party. Like wedding vows, it is “for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness or in health.” Unless we have the determination of Ruth to cling, not caring that the future would have cares and hardships, we will be turned away. We must say from the heart: Intreat me not to leave Thee, or to return from following after Thee: for wither Thou goest I will go; and where Thou lodgest, I will lodge: Thy people shall be my people, for Thou art my God (Ruth 1:16). But if we take the step seriously, we will most certainly have no regrets. He satisfies the soul as no one else can.
We were created to not be complete in ourselves. We were created to need something far higher and superior to lean on and find a refuge in, and that need finds its fulfillment in Christ. How is He our completeness? We want love, and He overflows with it. We want to be understood, and He knows our deepest thoughts as well why we think them. We want to be protected and shielded from trouble, and He calls us unto Himself—the Good Shepherd, Defender, and Refuge. We want peace and happiness, and this He will bestow if we give ourselves fully to His care. We want a hope, of which hope He is, an anchor to the soul in life’s greatest storms. We want someone to count on, to know all the answers, to be ever available, ever compassionate, always full of power, and He is more than we can imagine. We want a hero to admire and exalt, and that is His just due.
Complete in Him. I have experienced it and found it true and satisfying, like that perfect match of colors that never fails to thrill you, or that well-worn garment you can’t bear to trash, or a bite of that food you’ve craved all morning. It is a relationship to begin on, and continue growing in through the weeks and months that follow. When something would creep in to spoil my peace, I, like a good, young bride, need to renew my focus and draw near Him. When I am getting fretful or concerned, it is time to take time to talk alone together. And through the day, just as I would dream a wife would do, let me extol and rest my mind on Him, seeking every little way to please Him and bring out His smile. Then will I be satisfied in the completeness of His presence, alive in Him alone.